Harry Potter and the Horror of the Truth Spell
by Ivy-earth-gurl
Summary: What happens when the teachers get a secret dose of Veritaserum?.....


Harry Potter and the Horror of the Truth Spell  
  
"Life stinks like yesterday's cat food!" Harry said, and stormed out the dungeons.  
  
"Oh, what now?" Hermione asked as the boys came out the dungeons. "Detention?"  
  
"No," Ron said. "Why did you have to get out of potions?"  
  
"Professor McGonagall wanted to see me about my last test marks." Hermione gloated.  
  
"Gee, that's hard to work out, um, they were the highest marks in the year?" Ron said sarcastically.  
  
"Yes and-"  
  
"We don't CARE Hermione!" Harry snarled.  
  
"My god, adolesansance got you hard." Hermione said, looking hurt.  
  
"I'm sorry, Snape is such a-" (Harry called Snape something that made Ron and Hermione go "That's real harsh!") "He threatened me with Veritaserum again!" Hermione was shocked and outraged.  
  
"He can't keep doing that Harry!" She almost screamed. "How DARE he?" Hermione stormed up the marble stairs..  
***  
  
"Hermione, what did you do?" Harry and Ron whispered to Hermione and the feast that night. They hadn't seen her since Potions that morning.  
  
"You'll see." Hermione smirked evilly.  
  
"Let the feast begin!" Dumbeldore said.  
  
As soon as Snape picked up his fork, Hermione stifled giggles.  
  
"I seriously wanna know what she did." Ron whispered to Harry.  
  
"Me too." Harry replied.  
  
Snape took a first bite, and Hermione burst out laughing.  
  
"Hermione!" Ron and Harry said.  
  
Hermione was practically crying.  
  
"O.K, tell us what you did." Ron said seriously.  
  
"You-you'll-s-see!" Hermione tried to say. "My-side-hurts! HAHAHAHAHAHA!"  
  
"She's lost it." Harry said. "She has offically lost it."  
  
*****  
  
In potions the next day, Hermione couldn't contain herself. Before Snape entered the room, Hermione was laughing uncontrollably.  
  
"Good morning Students!" Snape skipped inside the dungeon wearing pink robes and pink fluffy bobbles. His hair was blonde and washed; for a change. The Slytherins gauped in shock, whilst the Gryffindors laughed. Snape didn't care.  
  
"The truth is that, my favourite colour is pink and blonde is my natural hair colour. And I'm in love with Draco!"  
  
Draco was as surprised as the whole class.  
  
"I knew you cared!" Draco said. Draco ran up to the front, and flung his arms around Snape. They started passionatly snogging.  
  
"Eww." The Gryffindors said.  
  
"Ahh." said the Slytherins.  
  
"That's how they do it in France!" Snape said educationally.  
  
"Draco, you bitch!" Crabbe said, standing up. "I thought we ment something to each other!"  
  
"We did! Crabbe!" Draco said tragically "I'm just not phiscally attracted to you anymore. Besides, you don't push my buttons like you used to. Snapie poo has been to France anyway! He knows some good moves."  
  
"Oh good gawd!" Hermione said, choking. She grabbed her mouth, and ran out the class.  
  
"Right." Ron said, freaked slightly.  
  
"That's just nasty!" Harry said loudly.  
  
Crabbe turned to Harry. "Don't mess with mess with me, i'm a gay-bo on edge! And I've got one nasty bitch-slap, and I'm not afraid to use it!"  
  
"Yah, that hurts. Yah." Goyle said.  
  
"Back to the point." Crabbe turned to Draco. "You bitch Draco!"  
  
"I know." Draco said. He turned to Snape. "I can't stop loving you baby."  
  
About five Gryffindors ran out the room, about to puke.  
  
"Right back at you girlfriend." Snape said passionatly.  
  
"Can you guys go without saying gay things for five minutes?" Harry said, nearly throwing up.  
  
Crabbe turned around and WHAM bitch-slap.  
  
"Aw." Harry said. "I think I broke a tooth, or three. No, that's definatly four."  
  
"Hurts doesn't it?" Goyle said.  
  
"Yes, yes it does." Harry looked at Goyle. "Hey, i thought you were straight!"  
  
"No, not really." Goyle said, eyeing him up.  
  
"Right." Harry said, kind of frightened. "I think I'll go to Madam pomfrey. Your getting the dentist's bill." He pointed at Crabbe.  
  
"Yeah, baby." Crabbe said. "want my phone number?"  
  
"No!" Harry said.  
  
"Want mine?" Goyle said eargerly.  
  
"eh..." Harry said, looking at Ron. "No, i't ok." He stroked Ron's arm,and winked at him.  
  
Ron blushed a beautiful shade of pink.  
  
Harry walked out of the dungeon. "Hang on, I'm straight! Eww, but Goyle did looked nice too. Yeah Baby."  
  
***  
  
That night, at the feast, the Gryffindor fifth years were telling the others what happened in Potions.  
  
They spluttered and the others had to stiffle laughs.  
  
"Excuse me, excuse me, Students! Students! We are going to perform some Muggle theatre as entertainment whilst you eat!" McGonagall said.  
  
"This should be good." Ron whispered to Harry and Hermione.  
  
"Now, without further ado, ROMEO AND JULIET!"  
  
"Juliet, Juliet, where fore art thou?" Professor Dumbeldore said.  
  
"I'm right here cutie!" Snape called from a fake balcony at the front. "Sorry I'm late, I was washing my hair!"  
  
Gryffindor, Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff laughed and laughed. The Slytherins almost fainted.  
  
"Forget this Romeo!" Snape called out, in a high voice. "I'm going to Broadway!"  
  
The old Elizabethan set dissolved, and Snape began to dance with thin Broadway girls. No one could contain themselves. Even the Slytherins laughed a little. Hermione's Veritaserum had worked. 


End file.
